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[xlDeMoNiClx]

Let me start off by saying that previous nominees for the “Most Bizarre and Ridiculously Pants-on-Head Retarded Game Name Evar!” including Neir, Armored Core: For Answer, and the thankfully non-existent Halo: Game of the Year Edition have now been swiftly defeated under the regime of DISSIDIA 012[duodecim] FINAL FANTASY. Honestly it’s like Square Enix have noted their reputation change in the Western world and in response have decided to start taking their revenge by anal-fucking the English language. Anyway aside from the twilight zone game title there have definitely been some changes and improvements and a couple of whoopsie’s so is this the supreme RPG-Fighter for the PSP or just another franchise ruined by the braindead minds behind the big-name big boys of the gaming industry.

Story: If you thought the story of the first Dissidia was a bit hard to follow then you’ll find yourself skipping most of the cutscenes in Dissidia 012 as the story has only gotten slightly more convoluted by trying to add depth to the same basic story they used in the last game: two warring sides, one side’s deity leader tells her warriors to find crystals but doesn’t actually tell them how to go about it so off they go on a winding journey of fighting lesser enemies, cutscenes and fighting bigger enemies in order to fight the big bad uber enemy at the end in order to fulfill their sacred duty of giving the end credits something to do. This time the story starts off focusing on the new characters that have been added to the roster such as Tifa from FF VII, Lightning from FFXIII and Kain from FF IV I believe it is but after you complete their part, up comes the part that lets the original cast join in the madness and cutscenes......in the exact same storylines that they were in in the first game. Like seriously? They couldn't make new storylines for the original characters, did they think no-one would notice or did they just say fuck it and copy-paste the first game story into the sequel and spent the rest of the development money on ice cream?

Gameplay: As I stated in my review of the downloadable “Prologus” that was made available last week for those of us who wanted a taste of what was coming before everyone else, the gameplay is where most of the changes have occurred such as the aforementioned Assist System but with the full game comes a few new features such as the Assist Revenge system where if you have a full assist gauge and are hit by an HP attack at a most inconvenient time you can sacrifice the entirety of your assist power to slow down time for a bit in order to get in a good few attacks in yourself which I like to call the “Fuck You” feature also the chase sequences have become much faster and are the new definition of the term “luck over skill” as you’ll find yourself just choosing which kind of attack to do and pray it’s the right one. Then there’s also the main feature, the fact that the game mainly takes place on a large overworld reminiscent of the style of the first Final Fantasy where you can explore the area, not suffer random encounters because the few enemies that do roam around are seeable and each of those tileboard dungeons are behind gates that you enter at your leisure which is usually almost right away as there isn’t much else to do in the overworld except the enemies, shops and the scenery. Anyway the tileboard parts are mostly exactly the same except for a few small tweaks and the battles themselves are still as fast-paced and enjoyable as they were before if not moreso and a little touch that I particularly like is that when you fight off against one of the main villains instead of them spouting a line at you both combatants will trade a little trash talk before the fight which does add a bit of extra competitiveness that pokes at the sadistic, psychotic side of me.

Design: The character models of both the original and new characters are clearly among the best on the system with the voice talent doing a reasonably decent job despite some awkward dialogue though some of the characters do seem to be completely different people at times as if they’re suffering from schizophrenia and multiple-personality disorder rolled into one. The new stages are distinct, nice, a good size, and fun to battle on. The music is outstanding with all the old tunes returning, some new ones from other games being added and some good ones original to this game in the mix. This is definitely a game that you’ll want to play with headphones on. Not much else to say as overall the game isn’t a huge leap forward from the previous one but there have definitely been some improvements to the graphics and it’s a beautiful game in its own right. The overworld isn’t perfect or outstanding but the areas are varied and interesting to explore especially if you enjoy collecting all the chests and stuff that are hidden around.

Dissidia 012 [duodecim] Final Fantasy while still having the most ridiculous name I’ve ever seen is an excellent game, the RPG elements meld in with the Fighting game elements nicely without being too complex and the story while being all over the place is mildly interesting and does an ok job of holding your attention to what’s going on in between fights and is just as nice to look at and listen to as it is to play and will almost certainly be fun for both newcomers looking for a good RPG and/or Fighting game to play or for veterans who were looking forward to this game since rumors of a sequel started popping up shortly after the first game was released.